Teleported!
by Piemage
Summary: Sasunaru oneshot. I am teleported to Konoha by a magic fairy! It is up to me to get Sasuke and Naruto together. There's some Sakura-bashing too! XD R&R please!


Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. At least, I don't in real life. I did have a dream once that I owned Naruto, but that is completely unrelated to this story.

Warning: BoyxBoy 'cause it's Sasunaru, Sakura bashing, and me being a crazy yaoi fangirl!

A/N: This is a fic for myself cause it's my birthday tomorrow!! (May 31.) I'm so happy! So I made a Sasunaru story to celebrate. I'm actually IN this one! (I'm Izzy. And YES that is my real name.) So please enjoy!

:-)

I hit the ground. _Where the heck am I?_ I looked around at the strange surroundings. This was definitely not my bedroom…. Still, as I looked around at the buildings I felt something familiar about the place. I glanced down at myself only to freak out. I had been animated! After a few moments of running around in circles screaming, I stopped to ponder what had happened. _Let's see, I had dinner, started on my homework, got bored and read a Sasunaru fanfic online….Then what? Oh yeah! That fairy-like creature popped up and transported me somewhere. Well that explains things. But where is "somewhere"?_

"SASUKE-KUN!!" I watched, stunned, as none other than Sasuke dashed past me with inhuman like speed. Then my attention was drawn to the giant crowd of girls were rampaging through the city towards me…..TOWARDS ME!

I just barely dodged them by jumping as far to the side as I could. A few people still stepped on me, but at least I wasn't trampled. I sighed happily as the fangirls ran out of sight. That is, I _was_ happy until I realized they were chasing after Sasuke. _No!! Sasuke should be with Naruto! They should all just give up!_

Suddenly it all became clear. I had been teleported here for a reason. I was to make sure that Sasunaru happens! I felt a surge of pride ripple through me. Out of all the Sasunaru fans in the universe, it was I who got the chance to personally pair them up. I mentally patted myself on the back.

I started to stroll down the street as I pondered how I would get them together. There was no telling how I could convince them. I decided that Naruto would be the easiest to work with first. With a destination, finally in mind I practically ran to Ichiraku's ramen shop. I slightly impressed and surprised that I knew my way around Konoha so well, maybe I WAS a little obsessed…..Nah.

I hopped through the doors and my face lit up as I saw Naruto at his normal seat.

"Naruto!" I sang cheerfully. He turned and looked at me quizzically. I plopped in the seat next to him and ordered a miso ramen. I was delighted to find that I could understand and speak Japanese without flaw. That fairy sure was thorough!

"So Naruto, I was hoping to discuss a matter very important. Do you mind if we go back to your place? I don't really want to talk to you here, you might start freaking out." Once again he looked strangely at me.

"Who ARE you?"

I slapped my forehead with my hand. _Of course, he doesn't know me! I'm not on this show!_ I tried to think of a way to convince him that I was someone he could trust.

"I'm a relative of Sakura! Just don't tell her I'm in town, she pretty much hates me." I said it slowly but energetically.

He raised an eyebrow. "Why? Do you love Sasuke too?" He rolled his eyes in annoyance.

I smiled happily at his jealousy. He may think that he was jealous of Sasuke, but soon he'd realize he was jealous of the fangirls being so close to him. I decided it would be best to get on Naruto's good side by kissing up to him. (I couldn't bribe his trust with ramen because I was almost broke….oops….)

I made a weird face, as if I just ate something really bad. "No way! If anything I'm a fan of you Naruto." I gave a smile and a wink. He blushed and quickly attacked his ramen. _Oh my gosh, he is such an uke!!_ I giggled automatically at the thought.

"So anyways Naruto, I really want to go to your place and talk to you. If you want, I can tell you all about Sakura." It was hard saying those words, being the Sakura hater that I was, but it seemed the best way for now. I grinned weakly as he beamed at me.

"That'd be great! Does she like me? What does her room look like? Does she like me? Why does she like Sasuke so much? Is her hair naturally pink? Does she like me?" His normal hyper, talkative attitude was showing. That was a good sign.

I stubbornly refused to answer anything until we were somewhere alone. He hurriedly slurped his ramen and dragged me by the wrist to his place. As we were approaching, I saw Sasuke within distance. Apparently, he had managed to lose the fangirls and was waiting for Naruto at his door.

"Sasuke-teme! What do you want?" Naruto shouted when we were within hearing distance. Sasuke turned to Naruto and seemed to just then notice that I was there. His normal blank stare turned to a glare as he saw that Naruto was holding onto my wrist. _Oh no! I hope Sasuke doesn't get the wrong impression!_ I bit my lip nervously. _But if Sasuke was jealous, then he might be more willing to do something to get Naruto from me…._I was so caught up in developing an evil plan that I had failed to notice the fact that Naruto had introduced us, but stopped when he found out that he didn't know my name.

"Izzy Haruno." I hated even uttering the last name, let alone claiming it as my own, but I had told Naruto that I was her relative, so….._Dang! Sasuke's eyes narrowed even more when I said my name was Haruno! Well I'm not exactly crazy about being kin to that pink-haired idiot either._

"She's my fangirl!" I twitched. So did Sasuke.

"She's _what_ now?..." Sasuke's voice was dangerous. I was scared and I hid behind Naruto. Not that he could protect me from Sasuke or anything, but I felt having something between us at the moment would be best.

"She's my fangirl! She also knows all about Sakura and is going to tell me about her! You'll just have to train by yourself today teme, because I have a lot to learn!" With that he pulled me into his apartment, leaving a fuming Sasuke at his door.

-Inside (and after more ramen)-

"Now, tell me about Sakura!" Naruto demanded as he sat down next to me on the couch. _Well, if he really wants my opinion…._

"She's a stuck-up, annoying, prissy, pink brat who cares about nothing but herself and Sasuke. She's completely ignorant, stupid, irksome, and an all around jerk and moron. She'll never like you because she thinks that Sasuke actually likes her because she's too dense and crazy to take the oh-so-obvious hint that he doesn't like her. You need to give up on her and move onto someone a little less absurd."

Naruto stayed stunned, mouth agape, for about thirty seconds before he flew into a tantrum. "How could you say that about Sakura-chan?! She's smart and pretty and-"

"And mean and cruel and a lunatic. Listen Naruto, she's really not for you. Please, I know Sakura really well and nothing good would come out of a relationship with her. I mean, she's mean to you now, do you really think she'll come around?"

Naruto looked down, confused and slightly depressed. _Wow. Did I really convince him that easily? I had this whole speech backed up about how Sakura is evil! Oh well, maybe another time. After he's hooked up with Sasuke, that is!!_

'Now, if you're looking for a good match for you, I think I know someone who would be perfect for you." My inner yaoi fangirl was squealing with anticipation.

He perked up slightly. "Who?"

"Sasuke!"

He looked as if I had just given him news that I was an alien from Mars and I was giving birth to his child. I then wondered how I came up with such a weird metaphor. I didn't have long to contemplate this because Naruto yelled "WHAT?!" so loud and long that I thought my ears were going to fall off.

"Naruto! Calm down! All I said was that you and Sasuke would be a really hot couple!" I Slapped my hand over his mouth as I saw another yell approaching. Finally he struggled out of my hold and complained.

"Izzy! Sasuke and I wouldn't be a good couple at all! He's an icy, arrogant, jerk, bastard, and all around teme!"

"But you like him, don't you?" I asked, a teasing smile resting on my lips.

"No!" Naruto gave a loud protest, but I happily noticed that he was blushing and wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Well, since it's obvious you like Sasuke, I'll just have to go over there and tell him!" I raced out his door before he had time to blink. He was after me quicker than I thought possible.

_Dang! Why couldn't that fairy have given me ninja speed like these guys do?!_ It was lucky I had gotten about a minute of a head start because Naruto could sit in shock for while, or else I would be dead about now.

Much to my relief, I saw the Uchiha mansion raise before me. I had just managed to ring the doorbell as Naruto came up and tackled me to the ground.

"Don't you dare tell him Izzy! He doesn't think that way, or like me that way, do just lay off it! Please don't tell him…." Naruto got quiet and it was kind of scaring me.

"Tell me what?" We both turned to see Sasuke standing in the doorway, a disapproving frown on his lips, probably from the way we were positioned.

Naruto scrambled up and took a few steps away from me before sending me a pleading glance. I sat up and looked at him for a second. _Gosh, I hate to be mean to Naruto, but….._

"He doesn't want me to tell you that he likes you, Sasuke!" Naruto's eyes filled with horror and looked like he was going to make a break for it, so I grabbed his arm and dragged over next to where Sasuke stood. "Listen Sasuke, he likes you, you like him, get over your pride and just start dating already. Seeing the two of you act like you hate each other is getting on my nerves." I then grabbed Sasuke's hand and put it on Naruto's arm so I wasn't the one keeping him from running.

They were both staring at me like they didn't understand a word I had just said. Suddenly they both (apparently) made a silent contract to ignore my presence.

I frowned at the awkward silence that had just developed between the two. I looked at my watch. It was taking them way too long and I needed to get back and do my homework. I walked past Sasuke who didn't seem to see me and looked through his house. After a few minutes of searching, I finally found what I was looking for. I practically bounced out of the house, camera ready. I then walked right behind Naruto and kicked him as hard as I could in the back, which sent him flying into Sasuke.

It now pretty much looked like they were hugging. The kick had pushed Naruto into Sasuke's chest and had backed Sasuke up against a wall. After a minute or so of looking into each other's eyes, Sasuke leaned down and kissed Naruto, who never looked so relieved in his life. I, on the other hand, was taking pictures like crazy as the kiss deepened. Just as things started heating up and I was getting more excited, they suddenly realized my presence and the annoying flashes of the camera.

Sasuke picked up Naruto bridal-style and walked into his house, but not before giving me a glare. I was still taking pictures. The door slam woke me up. Literally.

I glanced around in disbelief as I tried to comprehend what had just happened. I thought that I just successfully got Naruto and Sasuke together! Had I really just dosed off? I looked down to where my homework should have been laying, but instead was an envelope. I slowly opened it and grinned bigger than I ever had before.

"Wait until the others in the Yaoi fan club see this!" I hugged the pictures I had just taken moments before and sighed contentedly. _This was the best birthday ever!!_

Owari

So? How'd you like it? You can make my birthday better by reviewing this! That would make me very happy indeed. :-)

To people who read my other stories: About Miss Konoha, I'm kind of having writer's block on that one. The story was flowing so well, but then it came to a halt when it came to the interview. Ideas would be much appreciated. I need all the help I can get!


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